Felt so dumb.
So guilty of everything.
Regretted saying all those shit.
I'm so dumb.
Hais. I deserved to be feeling the pain afterall.
Hate myself...
Must thank Ian fer waiting fer me.
Thank yew fer the selfmade candle.
It's going into my collection.
Next time, don't be so silly okays?
I will be fine de lahs.
All the best to you n yur gurlfren =)
`I hate myself fer being so tactless . . . perhaps I should just shut up forever . . .
I'm feeling lyke a failure right now.
Blow after blow.
Don't know how long I can hold on to everything.
Seriously, I'm feeling lyke a complete failure.
Not that I have lost all my confidence.
Just feeling so weak to carry on.
Just feeling so discouraged and all.
But yarhs, things are going to be all over in three months time.
It's one month till prelims.
95 more days till A lvls.
Time's running out.
And I know I hafta get thru everything no matter how hard it is.
I'm mugging hard right now.
Kinda hard fer me to transform frm a slacker to a mugger.
But I rmbed dennis yeo's lect on fri.
"Are you hungry?" "how hungry are you?"
I'll survive =)
Hmms.. Wus listening to this old but nice song.. =)
My heart says we've got something real
Can I trust the way I feel
Cuz my heart's been through it before
Am I'm just seeing what I want to see
Or is it true
Could you really be
[Chorus:]
Someone to have and hold
With all my heart and soul
I need to know
Before I fall in love
Someone who'll stay around
(Who warns) my ups and downs
So tell me now
Before I fall in love
[Verse 2:]And I'm at the point of no return
So afraid of getting burned
But I wanna take a chance
Oh please
Give me a reason to believe
Say you're the one that you'll always be
Someone to have and hold
With all my heart and soul
I need to know
Before I fall in love
Someone who'll stay around
(Who warns) my ups and downs
So tell me now
Before I fall in love
[Bridge:]
It's been so hard for me
To give my heart away
But I would give my everything
Just to hear you say...
Someone to have and hold
With all my heart and soul
I need to know
Before I fall in love
Someone who'll stay around
(Who warns) my ups and downs
So tell me now
Before I fall in love . . . . . .
Such nice lyrics.. =)
`I miss him =(
Alrights. Guess Wquan wud be darn pleased.
Just taken the password off. *heh*
BUT! It's not fer your sake d lorhs.
It's for the convenience of anyone else but you.
Haha.
Found this on a friend's blog.
And felt lyke doing it since I am kinda bored.
Can you name 11 people you can thinkof right off the top of your head? Don't read thequestions underneath until you write the names of all 11 people...This is a lot funnier if you actually randomly list the names first...No Cheating!!!
1) Jeremy
2) Yvonne
3) Esther
4) Peiling
5) Weiquan
6) Khaiboon
7) Kai Jie
8) Evan
9) Ken
10) Zester
11) Florence
How did you meet 10?
`Secondary schmates?
What would you do if you had never met 6?
`there is nth I can do abt that right? it wud mean that I have one less great guyfren =)
What would you do if 6 and 2 dated?
Urms.. kinda impossible.. But I think it wud be interesting to see?
Have you ever seen 4 cry?
urms.. ya.. at the carnival thing that I got her into.
Do you think 1 is handsome?
my honey!! of course=D
Tell me something about number 11:
she is obsessed! heh
How do you know 8?
current classmate
Would you ever go on a date with number 5?
wahh? dun think so.. haha..
What's 7's favorite color?
yellow n black.. haha..
What would you do if 6 confessed they liked you?
*faints* 'cause it's impossible?
Fact about 9:
he's a 'fisherman'
Who is 4 going out with?
ME! she's MINE! =D
who is number 5 to you?
a great guyfren =D
Would you ever live with 11??
why not? I wun mind. ha
Is 2 single?
yes..she's mine too =)
Where does 7 live?
in choa chu kang..
What do you think about 3?
super gentle n sweet gurl=D
What's the best thing about number 8?
urms. I am not sure lehs.
What do you like about number 10?
ehh.. his determination when it cums to mugging?
Favorite Memory with 2?
kboxing sessions n my BDAY.
Finally done!! haha.
Am going fer dinner soon..
Having quite a bad headache.. *sobx*
OH! tml, my two darlings are cuming over to my plc fer a great time =D Wee!!! *hapi hapi*
Hmms. Today is an OKAY day.
My GP tutor didn't come.
Basically, had three and a half hour of BREAK fer todae.
Super relaxed day *grinx*
Had bioethic lect by sum old man after sch.
Wus alright lahs.
I wasn't really listening anewaes *heex*
Wus busy looking at people falling asleep *evil grinx*
Stayed back after sch, tot that Fei wld be running fer the trial.
But he didn't; so I just hung ard and slacked while flor n peipei mugged on.
Wasn't in the mood to study aneways.
Hmms. Went meet daddy after I left sch.
Hung ard at CWP.
When we finally got on our way home, it was already SEVEN-THIRTY.
I was lyke, "oh my tian"...
Den wanted to rush home immediately, but this guy walked past me.
Found him rather familiar.. so I stared unpolitely. *heh*
He noticed me n turned back..
He gave me his killer smile!! *melts*
And he remembered me!!
I still can't believe that I actually met kaijie by such coincidence lahs.
It's been lyke two years lers..
Ohh.. He's my ex-colleagues..
And he is the veryveryveryvery superduper cute version of Fei.
Nono.. I'm not thinking of fishing now.
Heheh.. Just happy that I met him again =D
Going to do my GP homework lers.
buh-bye~
Kinda realised that I quite lyke the font Verdana fer a change. haha. So round n big =D
Oh wells. Todae's a long boring tuesday.Got lotsa practices that I have to do.
Been feeling down.
Gastric pains.
Losing sleep *argh*
And crying myself to sleep too *hais*
Realised that I shldn't be bothered too much anemore.
No point.
Am going to change my hp number again pretty soon, I guess.
Can I choose to be happy forever?
Am going back to studying now.
Sumhow, I wish I would fall REALLY SICK.
Then I can have a good rest and not care about anething.
I must be mad.
Maybe I really am. *shrugs*
xin has been too bored after doing her testimonial on the school portal
and came across this nice friendster bulletin post which she thinks it's rather sweet . . .
A girl talking to her BF by the roadside . . . . . .
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy: No...
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: Not really...
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: Nope
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: Hell No...
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: Of coz no...
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No...
Girl: What would you choose: your life..or me?
Boy: I choose My Life
The girl runs away with such shock and pain in her heart
but the boy runs after her and shouted loudly....
"The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind...
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you...
The reason I don't want you is because I need you...
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left me...
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you...
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you...
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
So sweet right? haha. =D
Do all guys do that?
haha.
As in, saying sumthing when they meant another?
Anewaes, this is to everyone out there,
Tell her/him ' I love you' everyday for fear that tomorrow is not another . . .
It wus supposedly a great day.
'cause I got to meet my bf,
And got to spend sum quality time with him.
Wus really really hapi with him ard.
love him so so so much.
But, I hate the state I'm in right now.
I'm totally stressed out.
By everything..
First, I'm worried about my brother.
My real blood relations bro.
I don't dare to face him now 'cause of my phobia fer piercings..
Argh..
Am worried that he would be in bad company and stuffs.
Next, I stil hate the state I'm in.
Am still stressed out.
Maybe worse...
My A lvls are cuming..
And I'm finding it hard to conc with all the ongoing stuffs.
I hate the TAXI policy
If you get what I mean, you don't, then forget it.
Used to enjoy it..
Not that it brings about temptations..
It's just VERY troublesome...
It spoils friendships..
HATE IT!!
Can you please let me go..?
It's no point holding on any longer..
Let me go.. please?
Perhaps I just need sum time alone to think about everything.. I am tired...
Hapihapisaturday!!
Went out wif celest, boon, wquan, keatkee n zester.
Ben didn't turn up *shrugs*
The guys were quite shy initially.
So not their usual self lahs.
haha. But it was fun though.
Seeing them bickering awae.
Giving each other's secrets away while me n celest listen on.
Did sum duet wif boon n zes.
*claps* they were not bad wors =)
Did a couple of jay chou's songs with wquan
I didn't noe he cld sing wors. haha.
It wus a pleasant surprise though=)
Sang with my darling celest too =)
Took sum nicenice neoprints!!
SO FUN!! =DD
Sumhow, seeing everyone crapping awae.
Shooting each other with vulgarities..
All those immature acts in the kbox..
Sumhow, it didn't as though we all have been awae frm one another fer very long..
The feelings n all were just so familiar..
At times, when school gets too boring and dead fer me..
I would realise that I am actually missing these good frens of mine.
Miss all those good times =)
Met up with von after that. hmms. 'cause Jer cldnt make it. oh wells. Went shoe-shopping with von. It wus lotsa fun!! haha. Saw this pair of reali nice looking flats. Oh my tian. haha. Got the urge to buy lorhs. haha. haha. hmms. Had a nice dinner after getting what von wants. And then we met a couple of interesting people. Pretty friendly though. =)
`the day would haf been so much happier with him. It's been 22days lers..='(
Let me explain the title of this entry. haha. I'm finally meeting up with sum unzippers that I haven been goin out with fer a LONG LONG time. Hehehx. Especially Celestine. Haven gone out with her fer ages. A year and seven months le lorhs. While wquan, boon, zes, keatkee, it's just seven months. haha. Feel so guilty towards my darling celest. hehehx. But yups, we are finally meeting up TML! *so looking forward!!*
hmms. now fer the usual boring updates of my life...
1. I flunk my midyears.
2. It's been three weeks since I met up with my boyfren *sighs*
3. Been very cranky recently.
4. On-off fevers *hate it*
5. I'm finally going to step down from my post.
6. Cried two times fer Flor n Helmi.
7. Went to keep my darling Peiling company while she did her last day of CIP.
8. Met an adorable kid whu sat down beside me n refused to leave *heex*
Think that's about it bahs. haha. Had so much fun in the library today though I wus having abit of a headache still. Adorable kids just rawk my life =D OH yarhs, wus toking to Peiling n Yvonne abt our dear 'sister' 's bdae. No sarcasm orite? I am just not disclosing her name here. hmms. I've been having the urge to tell about the truth as to why everyone don't wana be with her or even around. I just feel so hypocrtitical, everytime I had to just smile fakely, act normally even though I was way disgusted about her behaviour. Heys. I am badly tramautised, just sitting beside her during lects, even if it's just fer an hour. It's scary lorhs. I guess everyone shld get what I mean. I don't mean to be evil or what. If I had intended to be evil, I would have just yell at her each time she starts doing it. Shouldn't we tell her nicely? I know she might cry. But the truth always hurts. And, if she's going out to the society to work, people won't be able to stand her either. And things won't be any better then. I guess, I would tell her soon. Stop my agony. As well as everyone's. And to help her be a more acceptable person.
Gona go off lers. Promise honey that I would do my practices. =)
`If I die, would you cry? If I stab myself, would you feel the pain?
Today's Pjc's Past and Present Day. haha. Went back to school early in the morn to support sanjay n evan's band. They were so fabulous! Great guitarists. Great drummer. N a great vocalist! The vocalist has a superb voice that can beat every single one of the contestant left on the Singapore Idol lahs. I can vouch fer that. And it's not very often that you hear such good comments from me. Usually, I'm very critical towards singers. But her, I have nothing to say. =)
Went to buy alcohol wif flor after the band thingy. haha. Den walked to her void deck to drink n have a heart-to-heart talk.=DD hmms. Den walked all the way back to lot one fer dinner. haha. Went home after that. And you know what?!! haha. I saw sumone. And the sumone saw me jus when I turned lorhs. haha. Just smiled n waved. =DD And another coincidence is that that sumone wus wearing the same jersey as me!! oh my tian lahs.. haha.. But ya.. nth much lahs. Jus abit high 'cause it wus so much of a coincidence. Nothing more than that. =)
hmms.. anewaes, I am feeling SAD! I got a big fat F fer my maths. argh. Am so dead. I just feel so stupid. Maybe, I really am. =(
Let me start off with the good news first kays? =DD
1. The freaking midyears are OVER!! *FREEDOM!*
2. No more worrying about sleepless nights!!
3. I have four and a half days of HOLIDAYS!! ~ *aren't you jealous of me?*
4. It's smart and casual day on MONDAY!! *no more penguins outfit.*
5. World Cup Final is on Monday!! *wahahah*
6. The best-est thing of all, I get to report LATE fer school on Monday!! *whee~*
*I'm overly hyper today! =D
hmms. Now, fer the not-so-good stuffs. argh.
1. No meeting Jer anemore.
2. Jer's exams are cuming *meaning that he'll have even LESSER time fer me=( *
3. I'm dying from lovesickness *sobssobs*
4. There is no official school holiday on Monday *can't risk ponning klass again.. gona get blacklisted veri soon*
5. Getting back the freaking papers on Monday?!! *why are teachers so freakingly efficient when it comes to letting us face our fears?*
6. I'm so going to flunk my midyears *No doubt about it*
7. Going to have tea in the Principal's Office veri soon. *Actually, I prefer coffee=D hehe*
8. It's 3 more months to PRELIMS
9. FOUR more months to A lvls *eww..*
10. And FOUR MORE MONTHS till FREEDOM is a LONG LONG time :( *goes crazy*
Yups. that's about it fer the updates. oh yarhs!! A reminder to all! Saturday's preformance must turn up wors!! My dear fren, Peiling's sanjiii, Flor's honeyyy is performing. And not forgetting our dear philosophical EVAN!! =DD alrights. Be sure to turn up fer a great time kays? =)
What is there to be said?
Been rather sick these few days..
Feeling giddy... Feverish n all..
All I can do, is sleep n sleep n stil SLEEP.
But all those sleeping seems to be doing me more harm than good.
argh.
True, I have been sleeping alot.
But NOT WELL.
Sobs..
Been drifting in and out of sleep.
This is so BAD!
I'm feeling weaker n sick-er by the day.
This simply sucks.
sobs...
Hmms. Tml's econs papers. FYI, I haven't hit my books yet. Don't think I ever will. Am too sick to absorb any information into my drowsy brain right now. Hais. Oh mans. Think I'm worse off than jus being dead fer this midyears. ha. Things aren't really going well fer me at this point of time. hais. Just feeling lost. oh wells. Back to resting. tata~
the german n argentina match is on right now. haha. My living room is in a mess. Rowdy guys. Almost drunk. Tsk! Current score: 1-1 Oh wells. I need a break from the rowdiness and alcoholic smell there. haha. That's why I am blogging fer awhile=D
Hmms. Its been awhile since I blogged. Nothing much is happening in my life, I guess. Mid-year exams are ending soon. I'm kinda slowly getting back on track. I need lotsa motivation! hais. *shrugs* It's five more months to FREEDOM! Whee~
Went towning todae. Jer wanted to meet me. But HAIS. It didn't work out. Shucks. I miss him sososososo much lahs. *sobs* Saw alot of ppl in town. Sorry ppl. I'm not really in a very sociable mood todae, 'cause I'm missing sumone far too much. =( hais. He's out wif his frens watching the match while I'm stuck home with the rowdy guys. HAIS!
*short interruption: second half jus ended: 1-1. extra time starting in awhile.. Noise level increasing.. Sum of the drunk n rowdy guys just lost money..wahahah..I am evil=Pp*
hmms. I'm returning to the tv soon. Just saw this veri meaningful nick which just popped up.. "Real tears are not those that fall from the eyes and cover the face, but those that fall from the heart and cover the soul." Oh mans.. this is sooo.. true, I guess? =) Enjoy the matches, guys=) Dun gamble too much. =DD